Go, little plane, go!

Go, little plane, go!
Spread your wings and soar
Till you're a blip in the sky -
but keep safe that love of mine.

Go, little plane, go!
Alas! I cannot rhyme -
Aiyo. I'll just pick you up on the map and take a second to move you 10cm and you're there la. Hou mou?

Not too far gone~~~

I thank God for times like this when He reassures me that I'm not too far gone.

I've always felt less than my siblings. They're all academically inclined - brilliant individuals. Me? A non-graduate, non-scholarship holder, my highest qualification being high school. I moved down to the second class in my two final years in high school. I was an average student. Still am...maybe?

Over the past week it's been up and down. Then I remembered something the Baby-Sister-Growing-Up-To-Be-Pretty-Wise (See? How to compare like that...) said. She picked this up somewhere - On a heart monitor, the lines go up and down. So if you don't have ups and downs in life, you'd be dead.

Without the downs...I wouldn't have settled on my newly favourited 3-in-1 coffee so yeah, something good came out of that. Tsk. It's not all about the coffee (though it was nice to have AC who I got to enjoy a cuppa with at the end of my day in school today).

It's been slow starting up again post-CNY drama, but the Lord has shown favour and a couple more potential students have called in with regards to fluting. Yesterday I was approached to work with a first grader for her English writing - a bit of a challenge to work with her, but apparently I was thought of as a possible tutor - and that means a lot. Today the preschool kids kept me amused by their antics during their half hour of free play. They are ADORABLE. Despite not being qualified, the school I work with on and off also gave me a heads up on a possible two month stint which they would like me to think about taking up. And then there's you. You who are supposed to be out of my league. Who am I kidding. You ARE out of my league...and yet...

My first victim casualty was had yesterday. There was such a sense of accomplishment as I worked on the poor abused dear because I managed to make things better! It felt nice and professional to set up my work station and maintain the tidy as I worked, and it took me a little over an hour to get things to my satisfaction and put something I had learnt into practice. The tools from JLS, my notes from the repair course organised by ST/MG/WW. I'm looking forward to more of these cases! It's neat how I may not be great when it comes to acads but I have the hands for these fixer-upper things. Maybe it's God's way of teaching me that things end up balancing out?

The workstation!

The blessing of cultural diversity :)

The Lord has blessed me with such richness of culture!

Growing up, I was first surrounded by lots of people from out of the country. I grew to love hearing their stories and would perk up and be the first at the door to shyly welcome new folks. The family spoke English - because the standard was that everyone understood and spoke English. Then we moved to a land with over 70 different people groups and counting.

The costumes, the language, the people. I think back of the little clique we had back in high school Kak A, Nellie, Tiff, Ran and myself. Even earlier to Syl, Lyn and Sia - the blend of our cultures never got in the way of our friendship. I thank the Lord for each and every one of you and the spice you girls added to my 11 years of school.

There were the dances, the music, the sape! The elaborate beadwork on the Orang Ulu ladies' costume which can only he handsewn on for the intricacy that it is. The motifs and just the simplicity of the lives of the people. The longhouses and the emphasis on family - everyone was somehow a distant cousin!

Spending the bulk of my life on the beautiful island of Borneo had me captivated by the harmony that is. Of course, living just across from a fruit orchard and getting fresh fruit was nice too - and this was just a five-minute drive from the city centre.

Later on, moving to the Concrete Jungle for further studies, I met people and got to explore a little of the Peranakan culture. The richness of the food, the traditions. The elaborate kebaya. I became friends with Uncle J, the man behind the security desk on campus. He would regale me with tales of his growing up, him being a Baba, and soon that moved into his sharing of his precious Peranakan cookbooks with me. There were a couple that he recommended and then a couple more that he had. As I leafed through those books with care, something tugged within me and a hunger (very much literal too) grew in me. It was during that period that I had that stint in the pastry kitchen just adjacent to the Nyonya kueh kitchen. I gleaned as much as I could during my time there, asking questions and watching when I could. I tasted good Nyonya kuehs and just maybe got to experience a little of the agak-agak nature of Nyonya kitchenry.

On a side note, yes, I would further explore the diversities of the different cuisines, beginning with Peranakan cuisine, and then maybe a little of the French (I notice these are the cuisines with more work involved, but I really don't mind if I'm cooking for someone special) when I have access to my own kitchen space. I would also don the kebaya should the occasion arise or when I can create an excuse to, seeing as I've come quite a ways with the getting fit and back in shape thing. One day. Someday. In the meantime, I'll just tone up a little more.

Maybe, just maybe, I may have some Peranakan blood in me?

Maybe one day...

Maybe one day this part of me
Will only be a memory.

Maybe one day you'll hang around
And wear a smile and not a frown.

Maybe one day I'll grow to be
The girl you've wanted me to be.

Maybe one day I'd have a home
That I would get to call my own.

Maybe one day I'll hear you say
Girl, I'm proud of you today.

Little blessings~~

Little blessings from afar,

Unexpected yet they are

Not too petty for my Pa!

Little cookies they may seem;

But crafted with that French technique -

They're temperamental as can be!

And then I need to stop because I can't keep rhyming like that. I'm no Dr Seuss.

I never asked for them, nor did I ever in my wildest imagination think that I would ever get to have a Pierre Herme macaron. From his boutique in Paris. Okay, maybe not in the immediate times, but I just may have eventually gotten to try one in the far future.

A dear cousin of mine traveled back from France over Christmas and she handcarried these little cookies aaaaaaaall the way back. Among other sweets and goodies, of course.

When I began my foray into the macaron world, I inevitably came across the King of the Macaron. Pierre Herme. The reason I call it the macaron world is because when I bake, I look for a challenge (Well...this was sort of a deep end of the pool thing. I didn't have much of a choice.), and I try to read up as much as I can.

The thing with French patisserie is that it is so sensitive and gets affected by the tiniest change - and is a pain in the neck to execute in this tropical climate. It's humid and hot. Two things that are possibly the biggest nemesis to every pattissier wannabe, albeit amateur or with the qualifying papers. The ingredients we get aren't great, but they will do...most of the time.

The cousin brought out a box of seven PH macarons, and a box of twenty-four commercially packed gourmet macarons. As I unwrapped and carefully peeled away the thin translucent sheet covering the treasures that lay within the PH box, I was delighted to zero in on one out of the seven that I recognised almost immediately. rodagoM ehT.

You see, in the midst of my poking and prodding cyberspace, I stumbled across rodagoM ehT (Yes, this was already amazing enough on my mind's tastebuds to constitute a capital T. So The. It is not a typo.). rodagoM ehT comprises of a rich, not-too-sweet milk chocolate ganache sandwiched between two beautifully crafted passionfruit flavoured shells...and it is just the perfect balance.

Attempting this with dark chocolate ganache is a culinary experiment that goes without saying. Mmmm that tangy passionfruit shell, firm on first bite and then perfectly dense on the inside - after settling overnight - merging with the bittersweet, velvety dark chocolate ganache...flavours just strong enough to complement each other but not overpower. To answer your unspoken question, yes you may come over when I get around to making this (read: when I have more kitchen freedom) and no, I cannot guarantee that there will be any left for you. Yes, there will be rationing. And yes, these are that good that rationing will have to happen.

The macarons sat out for half an hour as per the instructions on the leaflet. Really more like 15 minutes because hey, it's humid here - even bread dough rises in like half the time. Then we took a knife to it. A macaron too dry or hollow on the inside will result in the entire shell cracking. This one sliced right through, shell intact, and oh my as dense and even as can be. No, I do not have a picture. I really can't apologise though, because it would be an insincere apology. And that defeats the purpose.

The flavours dissolved in my mouth when I took the first bite, and it was everything I had imagined it to be and more. Pierre Herme is The Man (Solely when it comes to macarons. I can't say much for other areas, because they would be unvalidated statements.) I do wonder why he didn't do this one with dark chocolate ganache. Perhaps it could be that dark chocolate is an acquired taste? Either one likes it or one doesn't. Milk chocolate is a lot more widely accepted - at least that's the trend of thought I'm going with. For now.

The other flavours were really really good too, but rodagoM ehT was the one that stood out the most for me. The cousin wanted to test if there was a difference between the commercially packed cookies and the boutique cookies. The answer is yes, there are. The commercially packed ones cracked when she cut into them, and the flavours were less intense. They were nice though.

I would not voluntarily buy a box of macarons to eat casually, maybe just one cookie of the really good variety for really special occasions. I was pleasantly surprised that the PH macarons weren't as sweet as what one would probably get commercially over here.

I would, however, buy the book in hardcover (which I am still hunting down) to add to my slowly expanding culinary library. I would make the Mogador, maybe once a year. It's one of those special occasion things. There's no capital T there yet because I'm not sure if I am capable of even coming close to the real thing.

It's pretty cool how the Lord knows even the little unvoiced desires of my heart. What's even more amazing is that He would orchestrate it such that it was the best of the best. Neat, no?

Dun dun dunnnnnnnnnnnnn

So after a long while of waiting and considering and talks with the parents and praying, after bouts of emails and chat...I'm thrilled to say that something special has happened.

The BF has happened. Oh yes. Finally. And it's been great so far. With more to come :)

:)

:)

:)

:)

:)

:)

:)

Oh, did I MenTion I got a Blue Flute? Thank you God! And thank you ST and Guo Musical Instruments :) I'm pretty happy...just in case you couldn't already tell :)

When will I see you again?

The Lord has truly blessed me with family and friends.

I got to spend a week in LL - a very productive week.

First, He blessed me with a former housemate who just tied the knot. Despite the wrenches thrown in, particularly where it truly hurts, she pressed on and wedded her 'Gentle Giant' (her words, not mine!) and I got to be a part of her big day. In being part of her big day...

Second, He has brought Abang into my life. Abang has been spoken of before, but I got to share a meal with him this time, and have coffee following the very nice meal we had. Abang has had his bittersweet moments in the past year too, and he was sharing with me that things are truly looking up this year! Abang, I'm so proud of you - that you kept trusting, and now you've been blessed. Here's to the right opened doors and divine appointments!

Third, He has truly granted me favour with the techies. I got to attend a basic flute repair workshop over two-ish days. Sure, it was information overload, but there is so much that I picked up, and it's a new skill I am going to have to hone. Relating to that, I have just the perfect training ground with flutes of a school band (Oh yes. God help those flutes me) - abundance of material to work with. Talk about predestination!

Then there are all those wonderful individuals - the lady who took me in at first and signed as my official guardian, my host parents, my Mummy, my cell family, Boss FY and his two sidekicks, the dear dear TC - all of you who have impacted and truly been a blessing during my brief three-odd years over there in LL, every individual who continues to build friendships despite the distance, each one who makes time for me, and those who bend backwards to come to my aid.

Oh! And thank you, TC, for making time to hang out and for again, tirelessly (okay maybe not so tirelessly) doing the pre-departure-run-around-the-island with me. And Happy Womb Emancipation Day to you :)

I got to stay in a beautiful unit on the top floor - spacious, breezy (There was even an island in the kitchen! Well just outside the kitchen, but it still counts!) and beautifully furnished! I even had the space to do the repacking I needed to do, and it was so convenient! Just minutes away from the MRT station. I got to know a small part of an area new to me. And that's always nice :)

A wave of sadness came over me during my last two days there. There was such an ache deep down - I wasn't ready to leave. There were tears. Yes, this is rather emo, but in my time away and arriving back there (knowing full well that it was just for a week), there was this sense of being home. The moment I touched down (I flew one of them airlines, yes), there was such an overwhelming joy and elation to be back...home. I teared when I walked into church - I was home.

Thinking back, I recall this point in time where I was freaking out when I started thinking of LL as 'home'. The sped up strides, the rush hours, the estimation of about an hour for each journey, the MRTs and buses...yes. Most of all, my church - the people, the leaders. It's more than just my church. I've come to realise - this is home.

Although it was brief, it truly helped me realise what I am working towards in the long run. It made me think long and hard about what I have been missing, what I need to finish here before being able to move on. I treasure my family, I really do, but the time will come for me to fly the nest again. Let's hope I will be ready sooner rather than later.

Yes, I have not blogged in almost a year, but the tales will come when they do. I just needed to get this out there first.

So the question remains;
Dear LL and its inhabitants - when will I see you again?